KARLING__ time

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

WAS a bad girl

I was a slut.
I was a girl who cheats behind boyfriend's back.
I was a girl who thinks that everything in life is a joke.
I was a girl who doesn't think before she speaks.

The Kar Ling that was above, is long gone.

Jeremy changed me.
He made me the girl I am now.
The girl who loves her boyfriend so much that she can't even bear to cheat.
I can't even lie to him.
I can't bring myself to.
I can't bear to even think about how hurt he would be.

Now, whenever I look at a to-die-for guy, I don't even care.
I thought to myself," No matter how gorgeous that guy is, his heart would or might never be compared to Jeremy's".

You may think "BULLSHIT! WHAT A WHOLE LOAD OF CRAP!"
But it's really true.

I really love him.
I don't know how to live my life as fantastic as when with him.

Now that he's in army, my life immediately screwed up.

I got sick so easily.
My friend sees me as someone who would cheat.

I wish Jeremy's here.
I miss him.

I am very very sure that I will not cheat and find other guys.
I may go out with guys.
But in my heart, I only treat them as friends and nothing else.

I hope you would trust me.
Your trust for me is really important.
You may be just a friend, but you are important.
You make sense of all the nonsensical things in my life.
You were also part of the reason why I stopped smoking.
You guided me along.
I don't wish to lose our friendship because your trust in me faded away.

I sound like a les, I know.
But hell! those are really words from the bottom of my heart.

I'm sure you would be reading this.

Lastly, Jeremy, I know you won't even be reading this but....

I love you with all my heart.
And yes, we would take marriage vows together. I wouldn't take it with anyone else.
I miss you so much.

2:25 PM